"Gaydar" and why I don't have it . . . Share dating advice and safety tips

  • View author's info Author posted on Mar 08, 2007 12:41


    Okay, so I'm a bad lesbian. All of my lesbian friends have this remarkable gift called "gaydar" and I well . . .
    Can't tell the difference unless there is a neon sign above a gay girls head.

    How can I tell? What's the secret to a successful "gaydar"?
  • 18Comments

  • View author's info posted on Jan 04, 2012 14:13


    it just seems to be in the eye contact, the "Lesbian Look" I am getting pretty good at it, if not a couple of nice touches will be followed by the Look!! or the get lost cold shoulder, it doesn't hurt to get in there face and see if she is uneasy being close
  • View author's info posted on Nov 22, 2010 16:35




    Hey lilith rose, hows it going with thee gaydarr? dont ever let it get u down ,we all go threw this crap from time to time,main thing is trying to remain ture to yrslf and" put out for her" be positve. I guess its the( kind of womon) that yr attratedto that u find appealing  .do u think u look gay? Cause 2 wimmin ive met said they didnt think i was a lesbane & I RESPONED"SORRY I DONT FIT INTO "YR LITTLE STEROTYPE BOX Old School mentallity                                                                                                                                          

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  • View author's info posted on Oct 25, 2010 00:34


    this a message to all wimmin who luv &wanna bee with wimmin go out on a limb ,what do u hve to loose oxo
  • View author's info posted on Apr 12, 2010 22:50


    OK, well...my Gaydar has been 100% accurate. I just know when someone else is gay or not. If there the slightest hint of unsureness...they always end up to be bi. I don't know y but that's how it works for me.

    The born gay thing is apparently debatable for everyone an I have my own opinions but I've "never" been actracted to a boy/man. Not even as a kid, not in high school, not in college...not ever. I've always been the same way. There were no bad childhood experiences that lead me one way or the other as some many assume is the case...

    I am who I am and I don't hide it!
  • View author's info posted on Feb 13, 2010 23:00


    OK ladies... I'm gonna give you all a little secret I have learned about "GAYDAR"
    Don't be afraid to be who you are! Its that simple! Don't hide behind what your afraid ppl will think of you... be str8 up!!! LIVE IT HONEST! I tell most ppl within the first 10-15 mins of meeting them I'm gay (if they don't already know lol) and I by no means need to appologize for it! Most ppl once you share will feel comfortable to also share by letting you know where they stand on the issue... Lesbians will mostly come flat out and tell u they are gay too. bi-curious women will act nervous and giggle and maybe say something like I've always wondered about that or my fav. is I fouled around with my best friend when I was little lol... Str8 girls that are cool will say something like my boyfriends into that lol and last but not least ... Flat out homo phobic girls will quickly change the subject and try and cut the conversation short... My point...just be who you are and you will have no need for "gaydar" ;) It's amazing how far a little honesty can get ya.

    As far as the born gay and studies of little white molecules in ones brain is all pointless... If your attracted to women does the why really matter? You are who you are! Be it gay, str8, bi, trans, whatever... Children always ask why... "don't do that little sally".. "WHY" she responds.... As adults we learn to stop asking so many questions as to the whys and instead focus more on the HOW do I deal! Scientists can test theories and ppl can debate the origin but in the end....It is... what it is!!!!
    We are all unique and just simply love who we love, who cares why!
  • View author's info posted on Jan 31, 2010 17:33


    I'm the same way, I have no "gaydar" at all and all my friends do.
  • View author's info posted on Jan 05, 2010 22:42


    wow thats pretty cool, I'll have to check that out! thanks!
  • View author's info posted on Dec 27, 2009 14:48


    actually, we are not born bisexual. We all have a mole at the base of our brians that chnages colour when we hit puberty. How black the hormones turn this white mole determines our sexuality. There have been studies in Sweden on it.
  • View author's info posted on Nov 15, 2009 03:38


    Lmfao if you like other women then I would say you can't really fail at being a lesbian! anyway gaydar isn't some tell tale sign or a color that flashes when you look at someone, it's just a gut feeling when you're near/you look at someone.
    My gaydar is to a point that if i'm around another lesbian I blush like I'm embarrassed and I don't even have to look at her!

    It's intuition but that intuition needs to be geared towards identifying that.

    now as to the other comments NO ONE IS BORN GAY! stop saying that, thats stupid. no one is born having any sexual desire towards anyone else. sexuality is "acquired" in a sense. I grew up with four brothers and had a bad sexually driven childhood (not because of my brothers they would flip out if they knew half of what happened) but it all basically lead me to believe it was okay to look at girls.
    Basically, if ANYTHING, we're born bisexual, not homo or hetero.
  • View author's info posted on Aug 10, 2009 22:57


    i wud agree with that
  • View author's info posted on Jun 14, 2009 23:36


    i second that
  • View author's info posted on Nov 06, 2008 22:07


    (All women are straight til they're lesbians...LOL! ;-) )
    I see you have been watching the
    LOL. But That is true.I feel that most people are attracted to same sex partners,but they are afraid to come out.
  • View author's info posted on May 30, 2008 10:55


    Okay, so I'm a bad lesbian. All of my lesbian friends have this remarkable gift called "gaydar" and I well . . .
    Can't tell the difference unless there is a neon sign above a gay girls head.

    How can I tell? What's the secret to a successful "gaydar"?WHAT MAKES A 'BAD LESBIAN?' THERE IS NO SUCH THING, ONLY 'BAD' ADVISE CAN MAR OUR REPUTATION. THE KEY TO OUR SUCCESS IS NOT HOW WE LOOK TO EACH OTHER, IT IS OUR CHEMISTRY - ARE WE ATTRACTED TO EACH OTHER. SOMEONE AHEAD OF ME SAID,"IF THE ATTRACTION IS STRONG ENOUGH, "STRAIGHT WOMEN CAN BECOME LESBIANS" - OR WORDS TO THAT EFFECT. THEREFORE URGE YOU TO CONCENTRATE ON COMPATIBILITY AND THE 'BEDROOM EYES WILL COME LATER,
    RobertaB
  • View author's info posted on May 24, 2008 13:59


    you need to losen up a lil dnt be shy what you got to loose u crnt loose what u never had and u wnt know anything till u find out you need to go up to her and say hi get into a conversation with her then when the times ready ask her her sexuality if she says straight least you know but if not you mite be in look ;)
  • View author's info posted on May 24, 2008 13:54


    im not that good on advice giving but i think if you trust her to be serious with you about it as you know how ppl can be if they are straight and a gay asks em out i think you should get her alone were no1 is around and talk get to know her ask her wats her sexualisty if she says straight least that helps a lil more on what to do but if not you could be in luck hope that helps
  • View author's info posted on May 02, 2008 21:38


    I think MANY women are attracted to each other and the thing IS who is going to act on it?
    You never know until....
    I have had '"the look" the eye contact and full on sexual tension, BUT she was in a relationship and didn't act on it.
    So it's splitting hairs really to figure out who is or isn't.
    you just have to ask maybe. alcohol (sadly) sometimes helps as the truth serum.
  • View author's info posted on Apr 26, 2008 17:50


    hey Lilith Rose...
    Don't feel bad, i don't have it either. How do i get it?? I saw this woman three days ago at work, and i almost told her i was attracted to her, but i don't know how to easily let her know. how do i tell her??
  • View author's info posted on Jul 07, 2007 19:45


    Hi Lilith Rose!

    I can't help you. Sometimes I can tell and sometimes I can't... but most when I can it's because she's butch. I say if you see a woman you're attracted to... let her know. All women are straight til they're lesbians...LOL! ;-)
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